View from the Barnyard

The Long Road Home

The Long Road Home
I was mad at Gay on Friday. Virtuous she may be, but she hornswoggled me. She asked me to accompany her to Sioux Falls to pick up our brother, Corey, and his wife, Whitney, from the airport. I readily agreed and then she dropped the bomb. The flight arrived at 11 p.m. I tried to keep a brave face, but all I could think of was my 8 p.m. bedtime. I slept in the short-term parking lot and revived to chat on the road home. I became aware of an odd noise and I prayed, “Please let that be a low-flying airplane.” It was a flat tire.
Corey (coatless) searched high and low for the jack and tire futively. He resorted to the car manual and discovered it in a wheel well. A chilly wind was blowing and Gay bravely went out to assist. I knew I would be useless, so I didn’t budge. Whitney wrapped up in a quilt and said, “I have faith in my husband to fix this.” We took out Gay’s cell phone and looked at Pinterest and helpful decorating tips. We glanced up on a regular basis to watch the tire fixers discomfort. Gay relented quickly, standing in the dark (no flashlight) to call for help — Garth, Craig Olson, Carli. Finally, Tara (Olson) Larson picked up and called Carli’s hubby, Nathan, to help. Gay related we were by Hartford (we were almost to Salem). Nathan, thanks for trying to find us! How Corey and Gay changed that tire in the dark I will never know, but no one stopped to help. It may be because Gay was wrapped in an orange hood with just her nose and eyes sticking out and a crocheted afghan. I maintain Whitney said this, but she says I’m just throwing her under the bus. It couldn’t be me ‘cuz I gave up being a “Catty B@%*#” for Lent.
Flash forward to Sunday. What to do on a crappy, windy day? Play a marble game called “Joker” similar to the old “Aggravation”. We consider it to be a competitive sport “‘cuz you get to pick off your opponents. There is quite a bit of yelling, threats of revenge and gloating. Those of you who still think Soop is a “swell” guy, come play with us. He continually criticizes team and opponent moves and labels them stupid, dumb and idiotic. I yelled, “You’re not gonna browbeat me with your superior male attitude!” Janet asked Corey if he was sure he was actually related to us because he was too nice. Soop and Janet have to be separated because of his continuous criticism. I informed him to quit or he was going to give her irritable bowel syndrome. Whitney played like a true Baysinger and even challenged the rules and won. (She is a true teacher.) We broke out the wine at two in the afternoon and played until 9:15 that night (and we still hated to quit).
Corey and Whitney came home to be at the baptism of Jeremiah and Cassie Lindsey’s baby boy, Kolby. Corey had to Google how to be a godfather. (Seriously, he did.)
P.S. — We all may have gained 10 pounds this weekend because all we did was eat. Gay made her own “surprise” birthday supper. Ha!
Dee Baby

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