View from the Barnyard

St. Louis or Bust (Gay’s 60th Trip)

It has been a long time coming, in fact almost 59 years plus 11 months, but Gay is going to turn 60 years old. I think if you look to the east far into the horizon you can see a tiny speck of it.
True to her responsible nature Gay has planned her own celebration (months in advance).  Her big day is actually on April 18, but she will do her trip early so it won’t interfere with the birth of Gena and Chad’s baby and so she can help with the field work for melon season.
Her game plan is for a trip to St. Louis, Mo., to stay with our brother, Corey, and his wife, Whitney, and tour the St. Louis sites. Then we will hop on the Amtrack and head to Chicago for a few days. (The Amtrak train is on Gay’s bucket list.)
    The AARP participants will be wedged in Gay’s suburban for 11 hours and will include Gay and Kent, Soop and Janet, Janet and Pam, Georgia and I. It will prove to be an interesting jaunt to be sure. (Kent has always been curious as to what us divorced women do to lead Gay astray). He will soon find out.
Corey and I have been burning up the airways with anticipation and texting.
#1. Text – Look for us in a new white Surburban pulling a watermelon  trailer (a cut-off pickup box) with bald tires filled with luggage.
Corey – will you hurry up and get here.
# 2. Text – My morning coffee is like a heroin fix to me. Do you have a coffee grinder?
Corey – No, but why in the world would you put coffee in your Bloody Marys?
#3 Text – O.K., smarty pants, have you told your friends and co-workers that a Suburban full of AARP’s is on the way? By the way is your outhouse handicap accessible?
Corey – Yes, indeed it is and I’ve warned everyone I talk to of the invasion.
# 4 Text – I’ll have you know I’ve been attending “How to be Polite” seminars.
Corey – I don’t see the need for that, we are going to Chicago. Stop wasting your time and do something productive like drinking.
# 5 Text – Damn it, quit trying to get the last word in, I have to go to work.
Corey – Last Word.
More proof that Gay really isn’t the nice sister. I proudly informed her that Georgia has lost about 25 pounds. Gay replied, “Good, that’s less pressure on the tires!!” I told her that was going to hit the paper. She said, “Don’t you dare.”
I have included a picture of our luggage trailer. We thought we would help Janet a bit with her sign in case she wanted to use this trip as a business deduction.
St. Louis,
here we come,
Dee Baby

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